The Perils of a Self-Published-Tech-Challenged-Author

                                                          

I’m a good writer. I love writing. I’ve been writing since I was ten, but where my stories are excellent, I suck at the mechanical part of writing. Hence, I rely on my wonderful editor, Patti O’Brien, to remove the extra comma or to make sure the story flows, and that the reader isn’t lost in a swirl of science fiction jibber jabber. Once the editing is done, I send my manuscript to Create Space, the publishing arm of Amazon. I always order the special package that gives me my own team who will format the book for me, assign the ISBN, then after my illustrator, Shelley Szajner, submits the final book cover, publish the book on Amazon and Kindle. All I have to do is promote and sell my books. What could go wrong with such a great system? Find out after the jump.

Format Hall of Horrors

I’m not that great with math. I blame it all on fractions. I was an honor student for all twelve years in Catholic School, but even though I was good at addition, subtraction, multiplication and long division, when it came to fractions, my mind came to a full halt. I think my lack of direction when driving is connected to the same chromosome that controls my stupidity about fractions. The nuns at school could not figure out how I was able to excel in all subjects except math, and after several noted episodes, they’d learned to never send me on an errand that involved me finding my way to the school office. Really, I am that bad at directions and often wonder how I ever found my way through the birth canal.

                                                      

When I began using Create Space, I was overjoyed with the fact that my assigned Create Space team would handle everything. I had writer friends who also used Create Space. Some were successful in formatting their own manuscript without paying for the extra service, but some were not, and it showed in the finished product. I wanted my book to be professional and the price of having your own team was worth every penny. I had already published four books through Create Space. My Roof Oasis Sci-Fi Series was very popular because the books looked just as good as the ones published through traditional publishers.

 Fred and Lucy

I am a psychic/medium who has been seeing the dead since I was a toddler. This gift runs in the family. My mother and father were also able to see the dead. I grew up in South Philly, and worked in my parents’ grocery store. My parents weren’t the easiest to love, and my siblings and I weren’t the easiest to raise. I had begun to post weekly blogs about growing up in the grocery store and the hilarious antics of my father and mother. People loved my weekly blogs called “Life with Fred and Lucy” and soon they were asking when there would be a book. My parents who were both dead, had taken residence in my attic. They were also anxious for this book to be written. So you can imagine my shock when I learned that Create Space was no longer offering the complete author service, especially since this book would have twenty or more black and white photos included within the different chapters. What the hell was I to do?

Conclusion

I kind of lost it when customer service explained that this paid and complete service was no longer available. NO! No! No!  I even explained to the manager that Fred and Lucy would not be happy and would haunt anyone who prevented this book from being published. I may have scared the shit out of the poor guy, but luckily, he stayed on line as I submitted my manuscript. I am not sure if the site will automatically format this book as well as “The Team” did.

                                                           

I’ve tweeted Amazon about my unhappiness with their new rules, but so far, no answer. “Life with Fred and Lucy” is a humorous memoir of growing up in South Philly during the ’50s and ’60s, but it is also a true ghost story. I will keep you all updated on how the book is going.

Luckily, I have a good friend in my writers’ group who is taking on this project. Shelley will be professionally formatting the entire book, photos and all. So if there are any self-published authors out there who are clueless about formatting your book onto Create Space, or need a kick-ass book cover...Shelley is the person to contact. I know that Lucy and Fred are happy that this book is in good hands.
                                                               

Steampunk Granny Interviews Amy Holiday of Hypothetical Press

I saved the best for last, but we finally get to hear from the Editor-in- Chief, Owner and Publisher of Hypothetical Press, Amy Holiday, about her publishing company and her story that is included in the just released, Reading Glasses

Steampunk Granny: Amy tell us about yourself and what you enjoy writing about?

Amy Holiday: I'm currently the president of the South Jersey Writers' Group, and took over organizing in 2009. It's exciting to be moving to a professional organization. I also like outdoor adventure activities and have 60lb lab mix named Pixie. I mostly write middle grade and young adult fiction.

                                                             

Steampunk Granny: Since you’ve not only published Tall Tales and Reading Glasses, what do you enjoy doing more, writing or publishing?

Amy Holiday: Very different animals! Publishing is basically a list of tasks to cross off, which gives a feeling of accomplishment. But along with publishing comes accounting. I definitely *don't* like accounting! I like editing more than publishing, and editing an anthology--working with other authors to bring out the best, truest meaning of the story--is a fantastic learning experience (for me, and them too I hope.)

But the short answer: writing wins. I like making stuff up and it's nice to have an excuse.

                                                                     

Steampunk Granny: What was your inspiration for Fox Rose?

Amy Holiday: The first two backers at the "Name a Character" level on the Kickstarter campaign for Reading Glasses were two SJWG members and friends, Jord Fox and Nanci Rainey. Nanci wanted to be a mysterious figure, a spurned lover of sorts; she came up with the name Rose. And Jord is naturally a superhero. I came across writing prompt involving a "visit from an ancestor," and about the same time I visited Longwood Gardens. Combining one of the old Fairmount Park summer homes with a painting of a woman in a garden, which housed a ghost that haunted generations, was the initial seed. (There was also a donor who requested the character be named after his daughter Annika!)

For the Philadelphia buffs, Fox Run is not a real place, but I imagine the location as being Lemon Hill. There are no streams or gardens at Lemon Hill, but at the right angle you can see downtown Philly from the trees. I love the old homes and history in Fairmount Park.

                                   The Daring Amy Holiday on Trapeze                                 

 

Steampunk Granny: You’ve strayed from what you normally like to write; children’s stories and young adult. Did you like writing about the paranormal for a change?

Amy Holiday: Hmm. Yes, it was interesting. I don't remember where this concept of "do what you like" came from, but the idea of spirits in the afterworld helping us make decisions is compelling. (Ghosts with personal agendas may be a different story!) My original idea was for it to be a more scary kind of ghost story. But I think I don't really like scary stories!

Steampunk Granny: What other stories are you working on?

Amy Holiday: I just finished NaNoWriMo (whew!). That project was Summer Kids, a YA contemporary about kids who live at the Jersey shore (no, not that Jersey Shore! A nicer one.) I made the 50,000 word goal, but still have to finish the story, so that's my project for December. After I finish that first draft, I'm going back to the Middle Grade contemporary novel Belinda the Ninja Doesn't Dance. I had to put that on hold to finish up Reading Glasses. But Belinda is closer to completion, and I'm hoping to start pitching and querying by the end of 2015.

And, of course, there's the second collection due out from our Kickstarter Fundraiser, Tall Tales and Short Stories Volume 2! (Publication hopefully this summer.)

                                                                   

Steampunk Granny: Thank you so much for sharing with us, Amy, and we will all be looking forward to reading both Reading Glasses and Tall Tales & Short Stories Volume 2.

Reading Glasses can be found here: http://www.hypotheticalpress.com/

Amazon

Create Space.com

Smashwords.com



 

How Steampunk Granny Became a Hooker

                                                                   

My husband, Dan, keeps telling me that I’m working harder now that I’m retired. Do women really retire? The house still needs to be cleaned and the meals cooked...women don’t really retire. He is right about one thing; I am busier than ever. I spend most of my time writing, babysitting, writing, ghost hunting, writing, book signings, writing...you get the picture.

Writing the book is the easy part, at least for me. The stories are in my mind and they struggle to be released...but, selling the book, well that’s a horse of a different color altogether.

                                                                     

Promote, Promote, Promote! How do we do that? I contact coffee shops, libraries and book stores. To tell the truth, I will sell my book just about anywhere. I had the pleasure and the opportunity to sell my book, Roof Oasis, this past Tuesday night at a little shop in Audubon, New Jersey called Steampunk Works. I sold a few books and had fun talking to the amazing shop owners, Lee and Ralph Cobert. They have the best Steampunk clothing and accessories that you’ll ever want or need to razzle and dazzle at the next Steampunk Ball.

I really go all “Full Metal Jacket” to sell my book and you can usually find me at a venue waving my book in the air and trying to get people to stop and listen to my quick rundown on what the book is about. A close friend, fellow writer, and fellow member of the South Jersey Writers’ Group, James Knipp, once described my book as: Romeo and Juliet meets the walking dead written by Jules Verne. He’s right about that and “Saving Solanda” the second book in the series (which should be out by June) will have even more action and a few new characters.

                                                                 

So, let’s get back to promoting and selling my book. I told my daughter the other day that sometimes when I’m selling my book, I feel like a hooker. You know...“Hey mister! I have something that you want! Imagine their surprise when they realize it’s not what they think...Yes, I’ve turned into a book whore; a book hooker.

Do I mind being a book whore? Nah...I’m gregarious person by nature and I love meeting new people and learning about them. In fact, while I’m busy promoting my book and my love of Steampunk and ghost hunting, I also love promoting other people. I have met some of the nicest and talented people: actors, directors, musicians, fashion designers, models, authors, dead people and all because of my writing and book signing. I want to know their stories, what makes them tick and then I send their interviews and stories out into the world...

                                                                   

This week, I’ll be pimping myself at a few places and you can come look for me. I’m the one dressed in the Steampunk clothing with a ghost or two hanging around. Look for me in Maple Shade this November 6th at 6:00. I'll be at the Maple Shade Library on 200 Stiles Ave , Maple Shade N.J. 08052

My Interview with Intertainment Hub

                                                                      

I'm so excited. My friends at Intertainment Hub interviewed me on their show and we had fun talking about my apocalypse book, Roof Oasis, ghost hunting, zombies and Steampunk. I was even invited to play a game with the two fabulous hosts. They were so friendly that I wasn't nervous at all. If you get a chance, go to their site on Twitter https://twitter.com/IntertainHub  Follow them on Facebook too. https://www.facebook.com/IntertainmentHub


Thank you Scarlett and Nathan from Intertainment Hub. You rock!!

Who's Afraid of Friday the 13th ?

                                                                        

                                                                           

No I’m not talking the one with Jason the slasher killing machine from the Friday the 13^th films, but the actual day. I was born on a Friday the 13^th and although the world may have gone a bit off-kilter that day, I’ve always felt lucky when a Friday and the number 13 were together on the calendar. This year promised an extra zap to the day with the full moon falling on Friday. Was I afraid? Hell no. I make my own luck.

But, I had the other members of the monthly meeting of Goddesses coming over for a night of fresh percolated coffee, wine and snacks to discuss the poor state of the world, moving plans for one of the ladies, and my book launch for Roof Oasis, which is on June 29^th at 1 p.m. at the Treehouse Coffee House in Audubon, New Jersey. Janice Wilson, Patti O'Brien, and Joanne Costantino are  not only members of the South Jersey Writers' Group, but accomplished writers. Patti edited my book.

                                                      Janice, Patti, me and Joanne                                   

We toasted to our individual accomplishments, our families and life itself. We know how to solve the world’s problems, but it would require lobotomies for all of congress and most of the world leaders. We talked about the dangerous ways that corporations are destroying our drinking water and genetically messing with our food and then getting huffy when people or states, like Vermont, want to stop Monsanto from forcing us to eat their crap. Check it out for yourself: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ronnie-cummins/monsanto-and-big-food-los_b_5161220.html

We four women did not fear superstition. We are Goddesses. We each hold true to our personal beliefs and trust in them. But it was a special day because the next time a full moon lands on a Friday the 13^th will be in the year 2049. 

                                                                              

The ladies and I went into my backyard with wine glasses in hand and we danced under the moon. We celebrated our silliness, our friendship, my book and life itself. If you’re still around in 2049, drop by and dance under the light of the moon with us 

Pssst Have You Heard?? Roof Oasis is out!!!!

                    Grand Announcement!!!!

My apocalyptic/science fiction tale is out!!! You can buy Roof Oasis on Amazon, and Kindle. Check my calendar for upcoming book signings and you can purchase Roof Oasis on Amazon.com

                                         

How do you survive in a world controlled by a mad man? What if this dictator controlled the very food and water you needed to survive? When the use of bio-warfare inadvertently brings about the end of civilization, twins Michael and Lucy try to escape from the zombie horde, but their only salvation may lay with an old Victorian mirror in the attic of their family home…..

                                        

I’m sending a big hug to all my supporters for their patience and encouragement.

Fred & Lucy Update

                                                                   

                                                              Me with Lucy

I’m working on several books right now, but thanks to the popularity of my “Life with Fred and Lucy” episodes; I’m hoping to have these comical stories published by next year.

                                                                      

I’m sending out a big thank you and a hug to Joanne Costantino, a fellow member of The South Jersey Writers’ Group, for putting together a sample of what the book would look like if published. Seeing a sample of the finished product has put me on a quest to get the book published sooner than I had planned.

                                                                           

Life with Fred and Lucy is a collection of funny and true stories that tell about my siblings and me growing up in South Philly during the early 50’s and 60’s to dysfunctional parents. They were not the easiest parents to love and we four kids were not the easiest to manage. Sometimes, you can survive your childhood and your DNA with a large serving of humor.

Upcoming Book Festival & Update On SJWG's Next Anthology

                                                                     

This Saturday, April 26, Super G and Super D will be at the Rosemont College Book Festival from 10 to 3 p.m. Dawn Byrne, Marie Gilbert and Ava Easterby of the South Jersey Writers' Group will be there to promote our group and our book “Tall Tales and Short Stories from South Jersey.” The Keynote Speaker at the Book Festival is John Searles, author of “Boy Still Missing,” “Strange but True” and “Help for the Haunted.” There will also be workshops. So come on out and visit us at our table. We’ll be happy to tell you about our new anthology and our group.

                                                                   

Speaking of anthologies, I had a chance to ask Editors Amy Hollinger and Jessica Walsh about the new book our group is working on. Here is what they had to say.

Marie Gilbert: Amy, I know that you and Jessica have been very busy working on the South Jersey Writers’ Group’s next anthology. Are there any tidbits you two ladies for like to share about this venture before the book’s release?

 

Amy Hollinger: I learned a lot about how to run a Kickstarter fundraising campaign! Next time, we'll start with the stories and then raise the money to finish the book! For Reading Glasses, the stories are a bit longer than most of the short stories we published in Tall Tales and Short Stories from South Jersey. Editing longer stories has a different challenge in that action takes a bit longer to build, but the writing still needs to be tight and every action or event still needs to matter to the overall plot.

Amy (again): Also, the book publishing process is lengthy in itself, and rushing it--especially when it comes to editing--is going to result in a poorer quality book. Selecting stories for this collection was different in that we tried to align our choices on a theme.

Jessica Walsh: It's been a really great experience so far, although I think we may have underestimated the time it would take with the stories being longer and the editing requiring several rounds. The Kickstarter campaign was very exciting and it's been great being involved from the very beginning; fundraising, the call for submissions, story selection, and now editing. I am very excited for publication, and I think people are really going to enjoy the stories we've chosen for the Anthology.

 

Marie Gilbert: How many stories are included in this anthology?

 

Amy Hollinger: 12 stories, at the moment. Subject to change pending authors' final review of stories and contracts!

Marie Gilbert: What Types of stories can the reader expect to find in the book?

 

Jessica Walsh: The stories are all fiction; speculative fiction to be more specific, so the stories are more fantastical/sci-fi/stretched imagination. The stories take place in varying times (present/future/FAR in the future) and locations (the shore, a childhood home in the south, a spaceship). Although all quite different, the common theme is what makes them all work so well together as a collection. I can't wait to tackle putting them in order!

Marie Gilbert: How did you decide on a title, Reading Glasses: Stories Through an Unpredictable Lens

Jessica Walsh: It was really kind of a fortunate accident on one of the author's parts. He apparently had renamed his story "Ghostwriter" when submitting, but forgot to rename the title in his attachment, which was "Reading Glasses". Amy and I both loved the story and thought it worked very well as sort of a 'feature' story; a great representation of the collection and the spirit of writing. We actually thought the initial title, "Reading Glasses" worked better, so Amy contacted the author and asked him if he would consider changing the name back and if he would allow us the use of the title for the title of the Anthology. He was happy to oblige

Marie Gilbert: What was the process of picking the cover art? Did you have several ideas?

Amy Hollinger: I had an idea for something very simple, with just a pair of glasses on the cover. but our designer, Shelley Szajner, incorporated the glasses and took it way beyond my expectations! We had a little discussion on the cover, but one was a clear standout. A few tweaks and it was perfect! The art and the concept go perfectly with the dark feel of the story.

Marie Gilbert: Have you’ve come across a story, that one of you liked, but the other didn’t and how did you both decide if that submission stayed?

Amy Hollinger: We were unanimous on several of the stories. Let's just say, you can tell the difference between a polished story that has been through several revisions and had several test readers, and a story that has not gone through that process! But we did choose a few based on concept, and discussed how the story could be made better, whether through tightening the writing or restructuring the action.

Amy (again) We chose the sci-fi genre early on (based on a few standout submissions), although we accepted stories in literary fiction, YA, and memoir also. Towards the end, we received some excellent literary submissions as well, so we essentially created two book lineups, and debated the pros and cons of each. Speculative fiction won out, mostly because we had an early decision in the backs of our minds. Let that be a lesson to writers: Don't wait to submit; early consideration can make a difference!

Jessica Walsh: Amy's right, some stories just really stood out above the rest or just had a really good concept and we just hoped that the author would work with us. So far, they've all been very responsive to our feedback. There was one story that I threatened resignation over if Amy didn't approve, but fortunately, she really liked the story too haha. The challenge was when we loved a story that didn't fit the theme. We discussed ways that we could "maybe" make it fit, but in the end we had to ensure every story fit the genre we selected properly. We could always do another Anthology!

Marie Gilbert: When do we expect to see the book out?

Amy Hollinger: We are aiming for July publication; no final date just yet. Again pending final edits!

                                                                             

                                         

Thank you Amy and Jessica for the update and I’m sure all our readers are anxiously awaiting the South Jersey Writers’ Group’s next book. And for all you readers out there, keep your eyes open for the announcement of SJWG’s big book launch of “Reading Glasses: Stories Through an Unpredictable Lens.

Gilbert Interviews STRUGGS author, Brad Hecht

                                                            

When you attend any writer’s workshop or conference, you meet lots of interesting people including other writers, publishers, agents and presenters. It was during one of the Philadelphia Writers’ Conferences that I just love attending each year that I first met the very talented and personality plus writer, Brad Hecht and we’ve been friends ever since. Brad has his first book out, called Struggs and he was kind enough to be a guest on my blog.

Marie Gilbert: Thank you so much for taking this time to tell us about your book, Brad. Before we talk about the book, tell us a bit about you.

                                                              

Brad Hecht: Well that’s a tough question, I was born somewhere between the mid 1960’s and the late 1980’s the month and day I remember, December 13^th, the year, well now you have me on that one.

I am married and I have three amazing children. I still can’t believe that someone would let me be a father. It’s funny in the United States we need a license to go fishing but children, heck anybody can have one of those.

I have been a sportsman and a reader my whole life. Hockey, mountain biking and Jet Skiing being my passion, while reading and writing being my love.

As far as reading I never remember a time where I did not end the day with a good or sometimes a horrible book in my hands. The first book I ever read was Sidney Sheldon’s Bloodline. I was eight years old. Although that was not the type of book an eight year old should be reading, Sidney Sheldon and Harold Robbins were the only books we had in our home. I also learned at a young age that third person omniscient were the types of books that I liked best. I found that first person books were too limited.                                                                   

I have been taking writing class for as long as I can remember even back to grade school. I remember an incident where my second grade teacher (Mrs. Baker) made me write a scary Halloween story. I of course, wrote the whole story in third person. The teacher made me rewrite the story to first person. I did what I was told and received and A+ for the story. On my way home from school, I took my time and ripped the whole thing up. Unfortunately, Mrs. Baker had called mom to tell her to read my A+ story.

My mom walked me all the way back to school and made me retrieve all the ripped pages. When we got home the second time, I was forced to tape all the pages together so my mom could read the story. When my mom was finished reading the story, she agreed with me that the story was better in third person. My uncle a few years later read my story and asked if I did a book report on John Saul’s Suffer the Children. My mom immediately bought that book for me and I was amazed that our stories were so similar.

                                                                              

Marie Gilbert: Brad, tell us what your book is about.

Brad Hecht: STRUGGS is written for adults as well as young adults. It’s a fast paced, character-driven action/adventure story. STRUGGS Takes place in the year 1775. The book is a coming-of-age story for five quirky orphans ranging in age from 13 to 15 years old. By chance, these orphans meet two Irish privateers who risk everything to help them. Can these orphans and privateers work together to beat the British and save the Patriot cause? This is how it is written on my book cover:

               John is a 13-year-old boy who stumbles into the opportunity to fight for the Patriot cause. He is clumsy and has a knack for messing things up. Is someone like John capable of helping Henry Knox bring the cannons from Fort Ticonderoga to the Boston Heights? Melba is a 15-year-old girl with dazzling fencing ability, can she use her skill against British-trained soldiers? Red & Knuckles are impressed sailors stuck working as lowly ship-hands for the British navy. Can they escape to become privateers for General George Washington’s secret navy? O’Neil is a former British naval officer, former pirate and one of the best ghost storytellers on the waves. Would he help a nation with no navy? These are only a few of the courageous characters in STRUGGS.

                                                               

                                                                                                                              

Marie Gilbert: What was the inspiration for STRUGGS?

Brad Hecht: The inspiration for this book was my own death. I wrote this book while I was dying with cancer. I wanted to prove to my kids that ‘no matter where you are in life you can always achieve.’ I wanted to write a book about life’s lessons without writing life lesson number 1, life lesson number 2. So I weaved lessons into each character and every few pages, they aren’t difficult to spot but you do have to ask, why did the author write that? If you just read the book you will enjoy a good story. If you read ‘into’ the book you will see the messages I wanted my kids to learn.

               Well anyway, luck or fate was on my side because I lived. Best of all, I will be able to call myself a former cancer patient on May 12^th of this year.

Marie Gilbert: I’m so happy for you, Brad. Since we met at the Philadelphia Writers’ Conference, I wanted to know if you felt that writers’ conferences are helpful when writing a book. What did you gain from attending the conference?

Brad Hecht: YES, attending a writer’s conference is wickedly important. Most writers will say hanging around with other writers is important, but it’s really the knowledge you gain that is most beneficial. For instance, what should the protagonist’s age be on a Children’s book, YA book or a Teen book? What should their page count be? What are the ‘Common Core State Standards’ for New Jersey? These are three questions I bet most writers don’t know the answers to.

Marie Gilbert: How do you go about marketing your book and has this been successful?

Brad Hecht: The first thing I tried was Facebook that was a failure I think I sold three books via Facebook. Twitter and Pinterest were a waste of time also, finally I went to the BookExpo in NYC that was helpful. Then I called libraries and schools and sold a bunch more that way. Finally I started interviewing and blogging. My first month on Amazon I sold around 80 books and downloads which made me number one in my category. It’s been selling nonstop since November of 2013.
                                                                 

Marie Gilbert: That is so exciting. So tell me, are you working on another book?

Brad Hecht: Yes, I am working on my next two books, one is a coming of age set in 1777 at the Battle of Saratoga. The other is in present times and is a thriller/terrorist and action/adventure story.

Marie Gilbert: Thank you so much for being a guest on my blog, Brad. I’m looking forward to reading STRUGGS.

If my readers would like to learn more about Brad Hecht, you can find him on Facebook. His book can be purchased from Amazon

.

Help Me and Win a Book

                                                                        

 

Hello to my friends, family and friends I’ve yet to meet. I’m getting book one of my apocalyptic series published this year. It’s called Roof Oasis and it’s a tale about star crossed lovers, an evil tyrant, bio warfare, wormholes, aliens, and of course, zombies. I’m very excited about this book and I can’t wait for you to read it.

                                                                        

 

One of the things I needed to do for this book was get a decent photo of myself. That meant a professional and there was only one person I trusted to do my author shots, the marvelous Mandy of Bombshell Pinups. I wanted a photo that would represent me and what I loved to do and Mandy had just the set for me.

                                                                     

There are four pictures to pick from, but I can’t make up my mind which picture should go on the back cover of my book. I need your help. I’ll show all four pictures and all you have to do is send an e-mail to mariegilb@comcast.net telling me which picture you liked the best.

Once the book is published, I will pick three names from a hat. The three winners will be sent a free book. Sound good? Okay, here we go….

                                                                           Picture #1

                                                                        

 

                                                                              Picture#2

                                                                          

                                                                            Picture#3

                                                                           

                                                                            Picture #4
                                                                                 

                                                   

Miss Monroe and her Bombshell Pinups is moving to the SoHa Arts Building on 1001 White Horse Pike and will be open for business in April.  Once her doors open, you’ll want to visit and have your picture taken. She works miracles and made this old bag of bones look pretty damn good.

My friends and fellow members at South Jersey Writers' Group are getting ready to publish two more books. This is so exciting especially after the success of Tall Tales and Short Stories from South Jersey, our first anthology. I will keep you updated on our group's progress.